My Kid Easily Finds Cocaine

I knew this stuff existed at some point, but I really thought that by now it was a marketing disaster and was gone. I was wrong. Alert reader Sean caught this with his camera phone at a store BY HIS HIGH SCHOOL! Way to go, energy drink marketer guys!

He reports: “‘Red Hot Cold Drink Legal Substitute Cocaine Energy Drink Sold Here’. Even where I found it it looks like it just says ‘Cocaine sold here’.”

Maybe he should have asked the guy behind the counter.

Down On The Farm

So THAT’S where they are grown!

Support Local Business – Go Away

Okay. To me, the idea of putting this is the window is funny because it smells of desperate argument without backup,  while being a thrown-together sign. But the REAL amusement in it for me is that a travel agency is telling us to support local business.

Oh Shirt

I really don’t want to be mean, but I pass this sign all the time, and it repeatedly strikes me as both hard on the eyes and impossible to comprehend when passing at forty miles per hour. Each time, I absorb just enough to ascertain that it belongs to a graphic design company.

Unfortunately, my comprehension ends there, as my brain immediately becomes preoccupied with trying to determine why a graphic design company would give themselves a bent-looking, cluttered, barely readable sign done in such an uninviting color scheme.

It’s like giving someone a job application filled out in full-sized Marks-A-Lot.

Or do I go too far?

Yes We Can

I live three miles away. Could you keep it down??

It’s About Time

Thanks for letting us know of your wise policy change. Now I can tell everyone that your work won’t suck anymore.

From the Depaetment of Redundancy Department

All I can guess is that a lot of the kids in our neighborhood pass their license exams with a D-.

Argle Fargle What?

Signs like this one amuse and amaze me. Mostly because the establishments that have signs like this are always very much still in business.

How can it be that anyone who wants customers doesn’t either fix the missing letters or just wheel the sign back inside? These guys rent cars. Or DO they?

Punctuation Is Everything

I know this makes me one of those annoying punctuation sticklers, but to me, this sign indicates that no unauthorized parking violators will be towed. So do all of the unauthorized parking you want! Your car will still be there when you return.

The Infamous Exit 69

Big Beaver Road, Troy Michigan

I know that there are other snaps of this sign on the Internet, but this sign is a huge part of my life growing up in the Detroit area and spending my late teens and early twenties in the northern suburbs. The Detroit area has a band or roads around it, about a mile apart from each other, that we call the ‘Mile Roads’. You may remember Eminem’s movie “Eight Mile”, which is named after one such road that is the northern border of Detroit in most places.

Well, eight miles north of that is Sixteen Mile Rd, which has alternate names in various suburbs. The City of Troy calls it Big beaver Rd, so that is what it is called as I-75 passes through. “Beaver” has an off-color slang meaning, thanks in part to Hustler magazine, but truck drivers on the CB radio use the term as simply a slang for women in general. “Any beaver out there tonight?” It’s mostly innocuous. I know because I talked on the CB actively fior years.

But it loses it’s innocousness when they see this sign with exit number 69 on it. You can listen to channel 19 all day and hear trucker after trucker see it and make witty comments as if they were the first to notice, ever.